So, What's This Box?

And Mr. Huffman says, "What isn't this box?"

He stirs his light-ice cocktail and twizzles his moustache which we shall refer to hereafter as none other than Marvin. "...Burp...you need something sliced? Too bad. I got a box of hair. Diced? Wrong tree. Still a box of hair. A Useful Box of Hair. We are gathered here today, before all this bullshit, to marvel, not covet, this box of hair. Looking forward to it. I'm confident these H-Beam clowns can come up with some crazy uses for this Useful Box of Hair and so...can...you friends. The Crack-Pot Scientists at Wreakon Labs have brought you closer to a bigger, harrier box that we all know you're gonna love."

The Huff-Man takes a breath. It smells like hazelnuts and toast in here.

"Really, all you need to know folks, is that we all believe in you, H-Beam loves you, and there's always next time. Looking forward to this Box. It's gonna be fun. I might bring my Mum. And remember, this might hurt a little, you could always try harder...AND WHO TOUCHED ALL MY SHIT!"

Mitch Huffman and Marvin just passed out on your front porch with no pants.

Friday 09.25.09 : The Rutledge : H-Beam's Useful Box of Hair